Queen Esther

Where to Find Queen Esther's Story

Esther is one of only two books named for a woman in the Protestant Bible and one of only three books named for a woman in the Catholic Bible.  Her story starts in chapter two after Queen Vashti has been deposed.  

Esther Tells Her Story

"You know that I hate the glory of the pagans, and abhor the bed of the uncircumcised or of any foreigner." Esther C:26

  News of what Vashti had done spread like wild fire.  The Queen had said, "No" to the king in the presence of all his officials and they were furious.  The women thought this might bring a change in our lives but the officials made laws that controlled our lives even more.  

None of us expected what happened next.  The king appointed officers in all the provinces.  They were to search for all the beautiful virgins in the empire and take them to the king's harem in Susa.  We were torn away from our families and any life that we had hoped to have for ourselves.  We were put under the guard of a eunuch whose title was "custodian of the women."  We were given oil of myrrh, perfumes, cosmetics and beatifying treatments.  

Every night one of us was taken to the king's bed.  We were allowed to take on thing with us. In the morning we were sent to another harem, guarded by another eunuch.  Now we were concubines.  If the king liked us he might call for us again.  Otherwise???

In the tenth month of my captivity I was taken to the king.  I pleased him and he made me his queen!?   No one was more surprised than I.  I had not yet told him that I was a Jew.    

My foster father, Mordecai hung around the palace gate.  He wanted to get information about me and find out what was going to happen to me.  While there he overheard a plot, between two guards who were planning to harm the king.  He got word to me and I told the king what Mordecai heard.  The guards were killed and Mordecai was rewarded.  

There was a very evil man named Haman in the court of the king.  He wanted everyone to bow down to him.  Everyone did, except Mordecai.  We are Jews.  We do not give the honor reserved for G*d to a mortal man.  So this evil man decided that every Jew in the nation, man, woman and child should be put to death and all their possessions seized.  He convinced the king to issue a decree that on 12/13 every Jew should be slaughtered by the citizens of the empire.  It was a horrible thing for my people to face.  

Mordecai totally fell to pieces.  He tore his clothes, put on sackcloth and ashes and walked through the city, up to the palace gates wailing and crying.  No one is allowed to enter the gates in sackcloth, so I sent a eunuch to him with fresh clothes.  When the eunuch returned he gave me a message from Mordecai.  I was to beg the king for the lives of my people.

I had not been summoned to the king in 30 days.  Appearing before the king when one is not summoned is an offense punishable by death.  I wept and prayed along with my servants.  If I did not go before the king, all the Jews would be killed.  If I did go before the king, I would be killed first and then all the Jews.  It was clear to me that if my people were to be saved I was the one who had to do it.       

I bathed and dressed in my finest, royal attire.  I was terrified and leaned on my maid for support.  When I reached the king he looked up at me with such anger that I fainted.  When I awoke he was holding me and talking gently to me.  I had a plan to invite the king and Haman to a dinner which I would prepared.  I wanted to stay in the king's good graces and I wanted Haman to let down his guard.  I hosted two such dinners.  While the king was drinking wine at the second dinner I begged the king for my life and the life of my people.  I emphasized that the death of all the Jews would be a great financial loss to the empire.  As I hoped the king became angry and asked who had planned such a disaster.  Haman was petrified.  The king stormed out into the garden.  Haman began to beg for his life.  His final mistake was throwing himself on me.  When the king returned he thought Haman was violating me.  Haman's fate was sealed.

The Jews were saved.  The community celebrated the days that were meant for our destruction with feasting and rejoicing.  We called the celebration Purim and I commanded that Purim should be celebrated  every year.

Observation on the Story of Queen Esther

Not all commentators have been impressed with Esther.  As Sidnie Ann White points out in The Women's Bible Commentary, "The tendency among scholars was to exalt Mordecai as the true hero of the tale and to downplay or even vilify the role of Esther.  As late as 1971 Carey More stated, 'Between Mordecai and Esther the greater hero in the Hebrew is Mordecai, who supplied the brains while Esther simply follows his directions' (Moore, p.lii)" In the text Mordecai asks Esther to plead for her people, he uses shame to convince her of what he believes to be her duty, but he does not offer a plan. 

Other commentators, ignoring the fact that refusing the king's harem would have meant her death have  criticized her for becoming a member of the harem.  The implication being that she was there to gain power and wealth.  
  
Esther enters her story as the powerless, sex slave of a powerful king.  At the close of her story she is a powerful queen who has manipulated her circumstances and saved not only her own life but the life of all the Jewish people.  Like many women before and after her she has made a way for herself where there was no way.     



         

Forgotten Queen

Where To Find Queen Vashti's Story

In the book of Esther, Queen Vashti, was the queen Esther replaced.  When her story begins, Queen Vashti is entertaining women of the royal court.  She is commanded by the king to appear before the men so he can display her beauty.  Because she has no voice in the Bible we are not told why she refused his command, hence, many speculations.   "For instance, the Targum (the Aramaic translation of the Hebrew Bible) informs the reader that the king wished Vashti to appear naked before the company and that out of modesty she refused."  (The Women's Bible Commentary, P. 127)  Her story can be found in Esther 1:1-2:1

Queen Vashti Tells Her Story

"NO!" Vashti's declaration to the eunuchs who informed her the king had commanded her presence.

I knew the consequence could be sever if I refused, but he had been drinking for seven days.  His officers, ministers, nobles and governors were all there and just as drunk as he was.  When the eunuchs came to tell me I was to appear before the King wearing my crown, I knew it was only my crown he wanted me to wear.  I refused to go.  He said he wanted to, "Display my beauty."  As if my beauty belonged to him.  A room full of drunken, powerful men is no place for a woman, naked or not. 

He was furious!  They were all furious!  So the king asked his lawyers, "What does the law say should be done to Queen Vashti for disobeying my order?"

They were in a panic!  There was no law that dictated what was to be done to a woman who dared to speak up for herself.  "She didn't just wrong you" they shouted "she has wronged all the men in the empire.  If the women hear that the queen disobeyed the order of the king they will think they can disobey their husbands.  They will have contempt for us and will rebel against our rule over them.  You must issue an irrevocable royal decree.  You must forbid Queen Vashti form ever coming into your presence again.  The law must declare that the king can give the honor of the queen to someone more worthy.  When the women hear these laws, they will have to honor their husbands.  The law must demand that men are the lords of their homes.  

He made a law, an irrevocable law that I could never be summoned into his presences again.  I refused to appear at his command and now he can never command me to appear.  What a happy consequence!

Observations on Queen Vashti's Story

How do our attitudes about biblical women influence our understanding of the atrocities experienced by women today?  Vashti's story is clearly a story of male dominance.  She is commanded to expose herself for the pleasure of her husband's friends.  If we believe she got what she deserved, that is being expelled from the court, as some commentators have said, then we probably believe women should be under the control of the men in their lives.  If we see her act of defiance as self protection we see a strong woman unwilling to be dominated.
When I first read this story I was surprised that such a shocking story of male dominance has remained in the Bible.  Obviously, the male translators and commentators saw nothing wrong with a husband demanding that a wife appear before his drunken friends.  Nothing wrong with all the men of the empire being afraid their wives might say, "no." Nothing wrong with the queen being deposed for standing up for herself.  Nothing wrong with laws being passed to insure woman would treat their husbands like lords.
The men knew their wives were unhappy and would rebel.  They knew their wives held them in contempt.  Rather than changing the way they treated their wives, they passed laws so the women could not act on their contempt.   

   

Book Trailer

June 1 is the official publication for my book.  Please take a look at my book trailer.

My Book Cove

Her Hands

The only aspect of the cover I have not explained are her hands.  I was once informed that red nail polish is a sign of the devil.  Only her pinkie finger shows but in the original image all her nails are painted red.  I wear red nail polish most of the time and my hands are not a sign of the devil.    

Her Image

Following is a response to my blog.  "Hi Paula, I just read your blog post and I really understand all of what you are saying and I think that your book cover does represent all women." Following that post I got a correspondence from Christians For Biblical Equality.  They are soliciting funds for a partner organization in Africa.  They write, "EFOGE is struggling to bring change to a deeply patriarchal society that uses the Bible to fan fires of domestic and gender based violence and many social vices."  Before I had confronted my personal feelings about the bloody halo, I would have said it represented the horror of the Bible being used to fan flames of violence and the damage done to women by patriarchal interpretations of the Bible. 

   

 Marg, in her questions wrote, "I really like the book, but the cover just doesn't seem to serve it.  I see your target as Christian women (and some men perhaps) curious to read a more balanced presentation of women in the Bible.  Or feminist women looking to gain a new appreciation for biblical portrayals of women.  The cover seems like it targets young adult males looking for something dangerous and sexual."  Women's bodies, if not for public consumption, are dangerous.  God forbid a woman breast feed in public or make her own reproductive choices.   Women's bodies are sexual.  Barnes and Nobel sees a naked woman on my cover, not fit for their religion department.  

She is not for consumption!  She is looking directly into the eyes of whom ever is holding the book, not submissive or apologetic but some what sorrowful.        

 I recently filmed a Youtube video for the book.  The interviewer asked me to explain the cover.  For the first time I had to talk about being molested.  I told my husband and sisters before I posted the first blog about the cover, but I had never talked openly about those experiences.  I thought I was going to have a heart attack.  It must have affected me more that I realized because the next day my annoying arrhythmia, which has not bothered me for years, flared up.  My heart started flopping around like a fish out of water.  It has been good to face the pain I see in her blue eyes.

Healing

When I look at her I see me living in a woman's body.  She is me praying and bleeding and longing for things to be different.  She is me and I love her praying, bleeding, sorrowful, straightforward self.    

My Book Cover

Her Body

Marg asks, "Why use a female image that has been so obviously photoshopped when this book is about how accurate portrayals of women in the Bible have been obscured by patriarchal and cultural expectations?"  In the original image, the body of the woman on the cover is visible from halo to hipbones.  I did not want her to be sexualized and requested the book designer tear the image to obscure most of her body.  From the feedback I have received, it seems there is no way to present a woman's body that is not seen as sexual.  Barnes and Noble will not carry the book in the religion department of their store because, the buyer for the religion section is reluctant to put a naked woman in her religion section.  I walked through Barnes and Noble and took pictures of book covers that displayed much more of a woman's body than my book cover.  Granted, not in the religion section.  

Living In A Woman's Body 

The photoshop question never accrued to me.  I see in her the image of my younger blond haired, blue eyed self.  She is the image of me living in a woman's body that is, "obscured by patriarchal and cultural expectations."  A body that is never thin enough, or never has big enough breasts and is always in danger of being exploited.  That is just my experience.  A Unitarian Universalist minister shared her experience of growing up with big breasts and the, "patriarchal and cultural expectations"  that resulted from having breasts that were too big.    

Women's Bodies

Patriarchy is not comfortable with woman's bodies, not on display for public consumption.  A good example is the ruccus over breast feeding mothers.  Patriarchy is not comfortable with women's bodies that do not conform to current standards of beauty.  A woman's body my be praised for the curve of her breast but not the curve of her belly.  Bellys should be flat.  Patriarchy is not comfortable with women's bodies that are not controlled by someone other than the woman herself.  I Googled, "Number of laws regulating women's bodies."  The first statistic I got is that in the first quarter of 2013 Republicans pushed 700 new laws to regulate women's bodies.     littlegreenfootballs.com/.../298529_Republicans_P...

I see my younger self in this cover, praying and bleeding and longing for things to be different.  

My Book Cover

 Her Face and Hair

Marg asked, "Why use a white woman model, blond hair and blue eyes?  This is a book about middle eastern women."  

It was with surprise that I realized, when I look at her I see my younger self.  I see her messy blond hair and remember all the people who told me, "Your hair is so flyaway, it's like corn silk can't you do anything with it?"  Or the teacher in junior high who met me at the door every day with a rubber band.  I was not allowed in class until my hair was pulled tight in a ponytail.  

I look into her blue eyes and I see the sorrow I have so often seen in my own blue eyes.  When I was about four-years-old my mother sent me to a Bible study class.  The teacher asked if there was anyone who was not a sinner.  I raised my hand because my momma always told me I was a good little girl.  The teacher's reaction was swift and brutal.  Probably the reason I remember it 56 years later. 

On the face of the model, I see the pain from decades of sitting in church hearing again and again that I am a sinner and responsible for all the evil in the world, because of Eve.  I see in her face the pain of hearing that Bathsheba was a temptress, Mary Magdalene was a prostitute and Jezebel, Delilah and so many other women were all sinner and destroyers of holy men.  

Depictions of "Holy" Women

When I began looking at images for my cover, I found very traditional images.  Women with their hair covered and their eyes down cast.  Women with their hair covered and their arms out stretched, looking up.  Old women, nursing women, half naked women talking to fully clothed men, crying women, blissful women, submissive women, women with golden halos, nuns, icons and saints.

Yes, biblical women are middle eastern women and do not look like the woman on the cover.  The book is about biblical women and it is for me. It is for all women and men who are questioning what they have been taught about biblical women.  

Healing

I dyed my hair red.  It is just as out-of-control as it was when I was a child and I like it that way.  It is fluffy.

I still see sorrow in my blue eyes sometimes but now, like the woman on the book, my gaze is direct,  no apology, no submission.  To quote Pete Townshend, "I don't need to be forgiven."  I no longer feel the pain of male interpretations of biblical women but anger at how those interpretations are used to control and limit women.  The biblical character Eve is not the reason for all the evil in the world and neither am I.  Mary Magdalene was not a prostitute.  Bathsheba was not a temptress.  David was a voyeur and a rapist.  Jezebel was a woman following her own religious tradition.  Delilah was involved with a mean, egotistical man.  I can and do interpret biblical women for myself and the sorrowful, blond haired, blue eyed woman on the cover represents the decades it has taken to get me here.  

In my next blog post I will address Marg's questions about the woman's body.

 

My Book Cover

The Bloody Halo

Marg Herder, Director of Public Information for the EEWC Christian Feminism Today asked me some important questions about the image on the cover of my book. I am happy to answer her questions and explain what this image represents to me.  She asks, "What is the meaning of the blood dripping halo?" The first time I was molested by a "man of God" was at church camp.  Many of the campers and counselors were in the pool playing volley ball and someone  grabbed me between my legs. I didn't know who had done it.  I jumped out of the pool and told the female counselors what had happened.  I thought they would tell the director and he would find out who it was.  One of counselors was the wife of the director.  Later that evening the director apologized for grabbing me and told me he was surprised at my reaction.  I guess he thought I would like it.   

Molestation

Webster's Dictionary gives this definition for molest, "To bother, annoy or persecute: to accost sexually.  This happened five different times.  Two camp directors, one church pastor, one youth minister and one regional pastor.  Each time left my teenage self feeling guilty, dirty and ashamed as if my very presence had made these "men of God sin." I had never shared this with anyone until I shared it with Marg, April 21 of this year.

Healing

Thanks in large part to the feminists in my life I have learned that this was not my fault.  Those men, who my parents and I trusted are the shame.  The bloody halo represents the pain I carried for years as a result of the actions of those molesters who pass themselves off as "men of God." 

In my next post I will address Marg's question, "Why use a white woman model, blond hair and blue eyes? This book is about middle eastern women."